Cheers and taunts: Tuesday

Cheers and taunts for Tuesday, June 21, 2022

Note: Remember that you can follow me on Twitter at @BillinPortland. You will find news, sports, weather and lots of fun. In other people’s shows. But please follow me.

By numbers:

KeyLimeFestivallogo.jpg
9 days !!!

Days until National Coconut Day: 5

Days to Lime Festival in Key West: 9

Number of states with record low unemployment: 15

Number of states (NJ, OR) where you cannot pump your own gas: 2

Number of years Joe and Jill Biden were married last Friday: 45

Number of retail workers employed by Apple: 65,000

Years journalist / expert Mark Shields was regular PBS NewsHour before he died over the weekend of 85: 33

Date I created my first block quote at C&J: 06/21/05

Picture of a puppy of the day: Swell…

CHEERS to the Herculean clash of teammates. In 140 days, Democrats and Republicans will be brainwashed in the by-elections. But first we have to get through the season where Democrats beat the brains of Democrats and Republicans beat the brains of Republicans. For this purpose, here is C&J EXCEPTIONAL summary of today’s hot main action:

Alabama: Voters will choose the candidates they think are best at balancing their knees. It doesn’t look good for the Republican candidate for dog hunting at this hour Konekuh countysince all he possesses is a tuba.

Arkansas: Voters will decide in a referendum whether to make swamp gas an official state vegetable. Many Kansasarkan residents support the move, but election observers believe they will wait for the award to be presented to future Governor Sarah Huckabee Sanders.

A California primary voter shows a Spanish sticker
Did you know? More people are losing their fingers due to accidents with the “I voted” sticker than for any other reason. Be careful.

Georgia: I don’t know who will win the competitions here, but I can tell you one thing for sure: tonight Georgia it will come to my mind … wait for it …you all.

Virginia: Welcome in Virginia“An enigma wrapped in a riddle at a naval shipyard.” Virginia is a strange place these days – a blue state where a MAGA extremist has just been elected governor instead of a Democrat who had sterling experience from his first term as governor, all because of the nonsense MAGA said was happening in the state. that it didn’t happen at all. A fair warning, Arkansas: this happens when you make marshmallow your official vegetable.

Saskatchewan: Oh, didn’t we tell you? President Biden ordered an invasion of Saskatchewan last night they surrendered immediately. But then Joe had fun about ten minutes ago and said it was all fun. He and Justin laughed well. Indeed, people, you need to start paying more attention to the news cycle.

Follow the Daily Kos Elections team tonight as they add up the numbers and provide you with results in simple, concise and timely updates. I am obviously too qualified for this job.

DRAINAGE until another day to receive an undeserved salary. Today the members of Uvalde, Texas the police department will put on its uniforms, hang its badge on its chest, hang its weapon on its waist and go to work as usual. Why? I do not know. They must be imprisoned in a special prison for the greatest and stupidest cowards in the world for this, through Everyday beast:

Police officers in response to the mass shooting in Uwalde last month, Texasprimary school never even tried to open the door to the classroom where young children were trapped by the shooter, according to a new report. Ete During this time, 19 children and two teachers were killed.

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[T]he told a law enforcement source Express News that shooter Salvador Ramos could not lock the classroom door from the inside, and investigators believe it may have been open all along. In addition, the source said, an instrument of forced entry, called a hooligan bar, was available to officers during the siege, which would allow them to open even a locked door. The police response to the deadly attack is currently being investigated by Texas Rangers and the FBI.

To be honest, no one should be surprised by the actions of a police department whose motto – “Eat donuts while sitting around with thumbs up in the ass” – is clearly placed in their rest room.

CHEERS for great moments in agriculture! On this date in 1834, Cyrus McCormick received the approval of his patent for the first harvesting machine. Eh, sow what?

BRIEF CONDITION

END OF THE SHORT REFUSAL OF REASON

CHEERS to Day 4. After last week’s bombs that rocked public opinion waaay in favor co-chairs Benny Thompson and Liz Cheney will return to their seats this afternoon13:00 eastern) to continue to reveal the extent to which the Republican Party has managed to destroy America last year. Press here to find out what you may have missed so far through the commission’s Twitter account. Like this:

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Today’s hearings with Georgian Republican Secretary of State Brad Rafensperger will focus on how Trump has tried to put pressure on government and local officials to help him make his way to a second term. Instead of popcorn, we’ll pick on peaches. (In sticky syrup no less. We’re just fantastic schmancy this way.)

CHEERS to make eating Butterballs safe. 240 years ago, Congress approved the bald eagle over the turkey as US symbol. It was a difficult decision, but in the end they decided it just wasn’t that good with cranberry puree and sauce.

Ten years ago at C&J: June 21, 2012

CHEERS or DRAINAGE to move our money. The Fed will announce that it will do something BIG today! Feel the Bernankementum …

One option would be to try to boost long-term interest rates even lower to try to boost borrowing and spending. A more modest step would be for the Fed to emphasize its willingness to do more if the economy weakens further. Either the Fed can do or promise nothing more – not yet.

We will watch with … great interest! Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha !!!! That always kills them in Smith Barney.

And just one more…

CHEERS until the thawing season. Summer arrived this morning in 5:14 ET. Thanks to the Flying Spaghetti Monster, here we can feel our toes again.

Doggy days of summer as a 6 week old golden retriever puppy lying in a hammock on a tropical beach
Bonus photo of a puppy. My treat.

Two months (here, anyway – unlike our summer, yours may include September) peace, tranquility and boring news cycles. right? right? If only. But for Maine then right bring 60 great days of warmth after months of closing inside, closing all the windows and driving the furnace to 70. First item on our agenda when summer comes to the solstice: closing yourself inside, closing all the windows and turning on the air conditioning down to 70.

Have a nice Tuesday. In honor of his 90th birthday, here is the legend of films and television compositions Lalo Shifrin to play us:

This blog post will self-destruct in 5 seconds. The floor is open … What are you looking forward to and making fun of today?

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